Send me a PR if you know a good Dev Joke.
walks UDP package into bar A.
I would tell you a joke about UDP, but I don't know if you will get it.
Either way, I don't care.
If you wanna know what the "true friend" is... it's simple. look at the developer with QA
var war; Declaring a war :)
DEVdas
A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
this.engaged = true
Because they do not Node how to Express themselves.
My code never have bugs, it just just develops a random unexpected feature
You console it.
It didn't get the context.
Because she didn't get arrays
Inheritance.
Because they have constant arguments.
Because OCT 31 = DEC 25
Foo Bar
A URLogist
-Knock knock -Unsynchronized block -Who's there?
He keeps dropping the database
It had too many
#pisa-tower {
font-style: italic;
}
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
You know the joke of the guy who forgot to increase the variable in his while loop?
Because they use a strongly typed language.
He read the shampoo bottle instructions: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
Yeah, somebody who makes precise guesswork based on unreliable data provided by people with questionable knowledge. Never wrong. Likes tables.
Because it has Hooks 😂.
For a while
Just close the console windows, you wont see any errors.
She: I told him to call me. He: He asked me about my parameters and return type.
FORK YOU!
Guardians of the Galaxy
Hooks!
Because it's above C-level
They are both useless when you open windows
Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, “Are you ill?” The second byte replies, “No, just feeling a bit off.”
Answer: A person who fixed a problem that you don't know you have , in a way you don't understand.
Answer: Because they can't C# !
Answer: They stop calling each other.
Answer: 1
Answer: None – It’s a hardware problem
He: You're semicolon to my code ;)
She: I code in Python!
ALGORITHM(noun) - Word used by programmers when they do not want to explain what they did.
1/3 of US bandwidth is used by Netflix.
the rest is used by rm -rf node_modules && npm install
Debugging: Like the detective in a crime movie where you are also the murderer.
Behind every good program is a frustrated programmer.
Sharon: I'm facing error
Daniel: close the console window
Sharon: and now ?
Daniel: that's it
the error is gone
Sharon: 😐
Being a Programmer and watching someone HACK a computer on a TV show is like a nurse and watching someone in the movie take blood with a carrot.
Programmer 1: We have a problem! Programmer 2: Let’s use RegEx! Programmer 1: Now we have two problems.
She: I told him to call me
He Asked about my parameters and return type
Yesterday I changed the name of my Wifi to "hack if you can"...
Today I found it named "challenge accepted"
My girlfriend dumped me after I named a class after her. She felt I treated her like an object.
Have you heard about the new Cray super computer? It’s so fast, it executes an infinite loop in 6 seconds.
Trying to fix the problem I created when I tried to fix the problems I created when I tried to fix the problems I created when there was a problem
A programmer’s wife asks: “Would you go to the shop and pick up a loaf of bread? And if they have eggs, get a dozen.”
The programmer returns home with 12 loaves of bread.
“They had eggs.”
“Knock, knock.”
“Who’s there?”
very... long... pause...
“Java.”
Conversation between layman and developer
- layman: Hey! What's your address
- developer: 173.168.15.10
- layman: No man. Your local address
- developer: 127.0.0.1
- layman: I mean your physical address
- developer: 29.01.38.62.31.58
A journalist asks a programmer
what makes the code bad ?
NO COMMENT
There are three kinds of lies: Lies, damned lies, and benchmarks.
if (coding) {
headphones = true;
focus=100;
conversation = null;
}
"I know a guy who knows a guy... who knows another guy"
Two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, “So what’ll it be?”
The first string says, “I think I’ll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy~~owmc63^Dz x.xvcu”
“Please excuse my friend,” the second string says, “He isn’t null-terminated.”
-
Knock, knock
-
An async function
-
Who's there?
What do the new MacBook and a black hole have in common?
There's no Escape!
Answer: People thought it seemed scripted.
Answer: A fork.
One man's constant is another man's variable
Question- Me: My screens turns Blue, Mom : Fool,u deleted System32!
(.images/webjava.jpg)
What did the Python say when he came out of his shell? Print("Hello World!")
I showed my 12 year son aa floppy disk.... He said "ohh nice!! You have 3-D printed the save icon."
All programmers are playwrights, and all computers are lousy actors
Algorithm :
Words used by a programmer when....
they don't want to explain what they did.
I had a problem earlier, then i started using Java. Now I've a ProblemFactory.
"Don't call me, I'll callback you. I promise!"
An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks: “Can I join you?”
Friend: you both look like a cute couple!! where did you find her? tinder or insta? Me: GITHUB
"your dog ate your coding assignment?" It took him a couple bytes
I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
Answer: A machine that turns coffee into code
Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. It's a hardware problem.
Python and PHP.
One of these two is one of the most popular choices of backend programming. The other one is PHP.
Dad: So what do you want to do when you grow up?
Kid: Engineering
Dad: Oh great, so you want to become an engineer?
Kid: No, I want 4 more years to decide what I want to do
A guy walks into a bar and asks for 1.014 root beers. The bartender says, “I’ll have to charge you extra, that’s a root beer float”. So the guy says, “In that case, better make it a double.”